August 6, 2023

I realize the nickname Harry Boi won’t make him the most popular kid at school. But in my defense, I don’t think I was the first one to call Harry that. I believe it was Lauren, aka Aunt L-Dawg. And again, uuggh, these family nick names!

His given name is Harrison Elias Paul McBride. That’s a mouthful, so it doesn’t get used very often. It’s funny how we have tried out some nick names, and some have stuck, some not so much. I tried Sonny as a nick name for Harrison a few times, but that’s just not him. His momma calls him Harrison B, but I don’t know where the B comes from. His Daddy greets him with “Hey Boy” when he walks into the room. When he’s flying through the air, he’s a Harr-plane or a Harry-copter. He’s also known as Harr-Bear. When I don’t have enough energy for all the letters, he’s just H. But when the beat drops, real or imagined, his alter ego appears, and he’s Harry Dancer doing the baby twerks.

I know we are blessed to have Harry Boi in our lives, but I sometimes wonder if we are a blessing or a curse for him. I’d like to think he’s got some of the best of us. I have seen flickers of us in him from time to time, but I’m curious to see how our traits settle into Harry’s life. He’s got his Momma’s love for nature. His Daddy’s dark hair and sometimes that Superman curl. Aunt L-Dawg’s long legs. Uncle Intern Gavin’s adventurous, wandering spirit. Auntie Em’s bee stung lips. Papa’s undivided attention. And Lolli’s heart…he owns the whole damn thing, and I don’t expect I’ll ever get it back.

How could he not have my heart? He’s a sweet, fun loving kid who loves to smile and laugh. He’s likely to become a performer. Harry loves applause, and like any good showman, he claps for himself to prompt others to clap along. But he isn’t always certain about when clapping is appropriate. He knows that when we yell “YEAH Harry, you did it,” that’s a good time for clapping. But sometimes when he’s crawling around doing nothing particularly fascinating or spectacular, he’ll just stop, sit on his bum-bum and start applauding for himself until we join in. And we always do.

When he was just a little Harry Boi, ya know, like 11 months ago, I took him out to the Garden of Dappled Light and rocked him in the hammock. We still do that all these many months later. I don’t have to carry him anymore. He toddles along holding my hand as we wander off the deck down onto the stepping stone path. There’s a round resin stone one of my girls gave me a few years ago, in our pre-Harry days. It says “Life began in a garden.” How true. I’ve grown many precious plants out here. I’ve lost more than a few. Some have flourished quickly. Thank you Carolina Jessamine for making me think I have a green thumb. Others have struggled but are making a mighty comeback. I’m looking at you, Mother’s Day Gardenia; we’ll get through this together.

Gardens are where we plant and tend to our most precious crops. Isn’t that what God did with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden? The womb was Harry’s first garden home before he was birthed into Grace’s family and Eli’s family. Harry is being nurtured and grown, protected by tall, strong, weathered family members who know when to let in the light or to block too much burning sun. He is watered by tears of generations whose life lessons and experiences he’d do well to listen to, but sometimes he will reject. Harry will watch his Momma and Daddy more than he watches anyone else, and they will teach him about weeds and nutrients and pruning, and they will encourage him when it’s time to transplant.

Harry loves playing with Lolli’s wind chimes on the deck and in the garden. We haven’t given him his birthday gifts yet, and it’s pretty likely H will be getting his own wind chimes (don’t ruin the surprise). Friday evening, Harry Boi’s day 364, we toddled together out to the Garden of Dappled Light. I didn’t have the Garden of Dappled Light when Grace, Lauren, and Emily were coming up, but I sure wish I did. I’ve learned a few things about love through gardening and mothering that will be useful in my grandmothering, or Lolli-ing.

I don’t want to spend my Lolli years trying to atone for my Mommy shortcomings and failings, but I’ve learned to never regret demonstrating love. My regrets are the times I’ve been too afraid to love the way I should have. Love is trying to forgive even when you can’t forget. Love is turning the other cheek without turning a blind eye. Love is giving grace and mercy, without giving a free pass. Love is a hard lesson taught with a soft heart.

These are the precious crops I want to help grow with Harry and with any more grandchildren that I’m blessed with. Thank you to Grace and Eli for sharing Harrison Elias Paul McBride with us. And thank you to everyone who has watched their journey as a young family, and prayed and supported them. And thank you to everyone who celebrated Harry’s first birthday yesterday at his rock and roll theme party on one of the hottest days of the year. And Harry, thank you for the smiles and tears and burps and twerks and cuddles and toddles and belly laughs and claps. Lolli and Papa love you. Happy happy first birthday Harry Boi!